music reminds me of her

...music reminds me of her...

she knows not when i cast mine
eyes upon her whilst her face
doth capture the light of day and
the wind whispers to the flower

my heart flutters with a joy that is
not present in her absence like the
night without the stars and moon
or the day with clouds of gray

in her presence my spirit dances
my soul rejoices and savors from
the carafe that holds the sweet
of life’s drink

July 4th, 2020

I’ve witnessed ‘Day of Independence’ celebration in the United States of America today for the sixty first time. I came to ‘America’, no, I was brought to America when I was eight years young (now, a long time citizen). Knowing nothing about this land named America, when first mine eyes, wide and in awe, beheld the grand mountains peering outside the station wagon windows as an unwitting little person passenger. A piece of bread was given to me for sustenance that I put in my front pocket of my plaid short sleeve shirt. I picked and nibbled at pieces from it. It was supposed to last me all day and I made it last.

In 1972*, I recall being witness to this, another 4th of July celebration, made memorable because of a sense of relief (I hate fireworks) that no other young person was forced to go to 'hell', the end to the Vietnam draft had been announced on June 28th. Too late for over 58 thousand lives lost to an
'unnecessary' war; Because Ike and Tina Turner were singing on the radio station; Nixon and Agnew were enmeshed in Watergate and the Presidential election was around the corner.

Today (I hate firework explosions), the day’s sense of celebration is absent inside my heart and spirit because of ‘Black lives lost’; because the children of my ‘brown’ people have ripped away from the arms of mothers and placed in cages; Because COVID lives lost, many because of ineptness and an uncaring governance. Because the ‘moral fiber in the sense of human empathy in these United States of America has been corrupted by the vitriol and hate voices, led by ‘one’

I hope in 2021, when we celebrate the next 4th of July, the America that aspired to be, as found in the 1776 writ of ‘The United States of America Constitution’, will be one of a caring nation, of fairness and equal justice, inclusiveness. That we have elected a leader of our loved country that is willing to promote human morals, befitting the good of humankind, that promulgates equality and justice for all.

It begins with each one of us arising to vote, being kind to one another which will lead to listening to each other. We are inherently, if not intrinsic and genetically, morally good and caring human beings...

marellano

day, dusk, night

the Sun shall shine again with a glow of gold and

breath of warmth as the wind will become jealous,

blowing and swirling calling attention to itself despite

the sun’s prominence of yellow radiance and its warmth,

won’t be distracted by a cooling wind arriving with avarice

intent of a whirling and whistling breeze whispering, ‘I’m cool’

then dusk sneaks quietly in, arriving later than on a winter’s

day subtly waving at the Sun to go away and to rest, for it has,

thus, performed its diurnal duty on a lovely Spring day and as Its

dawning of the evening grey arrives, slowing terrestrials playing

asking Robins, Cardinals and Wrens to listen for nocturnal coos of

turtle doves as they praise their stay under starlight of a night sky

someday soon, through the grey and portentous of

the present disquiet, we will again begin our day with

elated spirit of wonderment and curiosity as to what the

day will once again bring, of how the heart shall feel when

the songbird shall raise its voice and lift our morning spirits

when dawn arrives, again rising with the sun and life’s verve   

a 'peace' of 'kind'

when i sit still and quiet, mine ears can

listen to the silence, they can pick up the

waves of what has come before and those

that otherwise i would not hear if i was

not in the present, ‘here’

my heartbeat is challenging every breath,

take in an energy of which both partake

allowing the verve of ‘Life’, of my being,

sprout and challenge the angst of which

so much is prevalent

today, now, the dress that Nature is wearing

is sunny and warm and so i raise my spirit

so that the spirit of my friends and family

can also witness the calm and peace that is

what i feel within

i ask of you to choose the good within yourself

and not the anger or the hate, to, if nothing

more, smile at someone, open your hands,

your arms for a warm embrace, share the best

of yourself, of the Human-Race

can you be ‘kind’ today?

life's smile

a flower question’s not

why and seemingly without

pain when its petals fall

the tree’s leaves bristle

and dance seemingly with

joy, in the breeze

the sun rises giving delight

to the day for this i know

because birds sing

when the moon smiles at

night the oceans seem to rise

and clap, stars glitter in glee

when thy smile, upon my face

also appears, t’if i were but a  

mirror to thine soul 

these mornings, now

…mine eyes open lately in mornings

with a spirit of reckoning, a sense

of foreboding, present in the

waking of these todays

likened to a grey ominous sky in lieu

of a bright golden sunrise while a loft

of aviary choir fills the morning stillness

after a restless nocturnal stay

i wish to hear the cardinal sing again with

mellifluous song that lifts my spirit, turns

the day from one of portent to one touched

 by the sun’s fingered rays

and so too, for a light of sprinkle rains that

shall rinse away and cleanse not just the

virus of disease but awaken the spirit that

once garnered love in lieu of hate…

stars soothe the pangs

the twinkle of stars in the dark of night

sooth the spirit when feeling alone through

the pangs of long days, then dreams to ease

the angst never come, for restful sleep desists

when first i searched the night sky for these stars

‘twas when but a ‘tot’ of six or so and left alone

with my other siblings but our papa had left us,

mamasita trying to give us shelter, never home

many years have passed, mamasita has left for

heaven’s home, although i need not for anything,

inside my wife sleeps and outside underneath the

night sky i look up to search for those stars again

letting light in

‘Darkness’ no longer instills fear within,

this being: a color that fills a space and

not that which lingers in the crannies

of a mind, heart or spirit

it had been instilled as a hurtful place,

a place of emptiness, one of loneliness

but as naivete waned it became a cove

of solitude where ‘selfless’ is found

in the years that have accrued, i’ve learned

that in darkness there is light and when

light pierces through, darkness is eviscerated

from that space where fear resides

in my learning of gathered years of aging,

‘Hate’ has replaced the space that darkness

once resided, for it is this demon that must be

squelched, it must be destroyed

some carry this ‘hate’ in their pockets for they

have been bitten and devoured by it and on

every occasion will pull it out to contaminate

all that surrounds, in hearts and minds

let us not fear ‘hate’ for then it will have won

my words for you

If my words reach your eyes

or in your ears, let them also

touch your heart, your spirit

in a way that’s soft and gentle

soothing and calming

like keys on a piano in the treble clef

or the strings on a violin that make

the cilia like hairs on your arms and

legs stand up and dance, t’if a warm

breeze titillating them

if by chance my words inspire to picture

in your mind of cool sparkling brooks and

streams so clear the eyes can see pink

salmon running, deer drinking from them and

upon its banks are strewn of flowery meadows

to reminisce of memories fond and loving

even if they cause tears to flow from missing

love ones of those that have come and gone

and even of loves faltered and hearts scorned,

days forlorn, now passing of dissipated mourn

if my words have touched your sensibilities

then i shall have painted on your diurnal canvas

for you to appreciate and share of what is

in our hearts, our souls

blessed

Spring in March is coming soon so in my dream

i dreamt of warm breezes, of calm and peace

while sitting underneath my pink blossoming

Crabtree

i sat in silence, thought i heard the flower open,

the Sun rise, letting the petals of the flower feed

from its fingertips of rays and ever so clearly listen

to an avian chorus praise the beginning of today

my heart flutters with joy, blessed to witness this

and feel my spirit dancing within as the purple

passion unabashedly displays its color, the lilac

shares Itself so that all can sense the waft of day

shall ride this moment for all its worth because i

know not all are witness to this, for some cannot

see or smell, feel breezes that make flowers dance

or be seduced by the morning, dusk or night, their

great misfortunes in life provide them little chance  

a moment of calm

shadows cast not, when grays hover o’er

but what is grand is the tickling upon my skin

from tiny drizzles of rain that slowly empty

the bloviated cumulus that dangle from the sky

i tilt my head toward the heavens so that i can

witness the tiny droplets falling, scurrying down

to be the first to touch the ground and quench

the thirst of the daisy, the lily and the tree

i am grateful for this moment distracting me

from the woes that surround, from the pangs

and angst of life’s beguiles, from lament and

tears of those i witness and i feel their pain

and when this moment passes, let it be that

the smile upon my face, the memory of this

calm and gentle pace i may share with others

and those within the circle of my love

my steps today

step by short step i walk the day

i look around, witness the surround

smell the waft of the conifer, the flower

feel the breath of what fills the lungs of life

now dusk, i sit on the lap of my crab apple tree

to see the large warm star lay rest in the horizon

am witnessing the silhouette of a winged friend fly

amidst the canvas of a mellowing day, now sleepy sky

in my quiet underneath the stars and a smiling moon

i listen to the rustlings of life i speak from my spirit within

to the spirit of the universe giving thanks for allowing me this

moment and those that came before as i strolled through this day

snow's delight

water droplets are miraculously transformed as

they fall out from clouds into sculptured snowflakes

each unique on its own but when they fall together

from the sky they turn the horizon white

they fall from above into the crisp Winter winds

then onto rustic colored tree limbs, atop shingles on

roofs, on stalks and atop sleeping petals of flowers

then cover in a white blanket golden blades of grass

when the snowflakes lay to rest on tops of who it’s

befallen, it covers all with an alabaster white by day

on the winter’s rustic hue but in the in the noir of

night it paints a bright white from the moon’s light  

my life's fortune

my life’s journey may not have seen

as many distant lands as you but

i have seen a few and have traversed

places in reveries of my mind having

witnessed pharaohs and having read

the words of shaman and poets, that in

my world, have painted pictures others

have never seen. they’ve shared their

wisdom, filling my heart of melancholy

and lament along with tears that flow

and capture my soul

when this mundane journey of mine ends,

i shall smile having been privileged to visions

unforeseen, listening to mellifluous vibes

and the waft of Nature. having been touched  

and tasted what was for me. the feelings in

my heart of scorn and joy and everlasting

memories, but i am most grateful, for warmth

of an embrace, and the gentleness of love’s kiss

stars watch o'er me

with cool air, the night air falls upon my cheek

i walk outside to look up at the stars trying

to catch the lunar smile, to get a peek

to see if the stars of yore are the same of when

in my toddler years i’d peer up, wide eyed, at the

night sky hovering o’er the pueblo of my origin

back when, still my years were few on earth, i’d

look up in innocence with ‘montanas’ surround

defusing the few lights in adobe casas 

future dreams and aspiration had not yet entered

into  ‘el mente y espiritu’ of a three year old but

even then i recognized the miracle of stars

much love, pain and sorrow of life’s vicissitudes and  

pangs have ridden on my shoulders, now, in this journey

and still, the heavenly warrior, ‘Orion’, hovers o’er me

dawn will soon arrive and the Sun will make dew drops

sparkle t’if the stars of night had fallen from the sky and

critters will awaken to aviary chorus of song

my day begins to this delight where dreams transition

into reveries with eyes wide open, the sun teasing and

tickling flora with its rays and my spirit rejoices the day  

grateful today

i walk, no longer run

like when i was young
now, i look around not just
forward or behind, no longer
wish to speed up hours and days
and i cherish the present moments
with and every minute, i take my time

the sun rises on this glorious morning

i’m grateful that mine eyes opened
and so, i give praise for this day
the wonderment that it brings
my body my soul chose to
give me more time on
this earth, to stay

i cherish the flower, the

tree, the bird that perches
and sings for me, the wind
that caresses my cheek, the
grass tickling my toes on bare
and naked feet, but mostly that
in me enough love resides to share

years on Earth

time has stolen my years

has taken my deer like spring

and now i move like a sloth

where my years have passed

now only memories reside,

an empty space doth now replace

and if my spirit is in the wind

it shall traverse through time

riding a stream of a river’s rim

so when the wind blows upon

your face and in your stroll you

dip your toes at the river’s bend

take note of my heart within,

breathe of my breath, for it is my

spirit touching your soul

while my spirit blows in the wind

the blood of my heart lies in the grass,

for of the earth is where i came,

and so too, where i shall pass

still

the shadows will be my attire

though my voice will be heard and

my heart will sing in rhythm and

along with my soul they will rhyme

i shan’t write a book, that of me,

you’ve pressed, but i will write you

a poem and read it to you so that your

heart with your soul will also rhyme

these words that i will scribe and share

with you, hope to make them sing on

the page so when you read them, they

will ask your feet to dance

though, you may never read my book or

see my face, as i will remain in the shadows

until my heart is still, my body laid to rest

my soul will not cease to dance and through

words and in some hearts, may they fill

selfless moment

noticed a flower standing alone amidst a

forest of tall trees that hovered over it as

and it stood still except when a breeze

blew through then it would dance

i didn’t know what kind it was but i noticed

It’s tincture of blue petals and yellow center

standing alone seemingly not fazed by its

comparative stature compared to the

giant sequoias

i stood there observing it for a while

wondering how it survived the giant

world around it then i noticed a ray

of sun piercing through the trees

like a spotlight, it shined upon it

then within me evinced this poignant thought

… that in this large world of giant trees and

grand mountains, vast oceans, high clouds

dangling from an unreachable sky, a light

will pierce through, shine upon me, a

moment of selfless, all will be well   

a hug

3am; awaken desiring a warm embrace,

the tactile connection of which i so desire in

trying to recall the gentle warmth of touch

letting the soothing calm come o’er me for

a moment, even if short lived, escaping the

grip from the purveyor of anguish called, life

it was in my dreams where no matter of the

juxtaposed surreal reveries while sleep avails, in

the theater where dreams evolve and whose sense

of reality is ethereal and the drama of them then

ceases so that my ‘self’, the observer, walks onto

the stage with desire of a hug from anyone

so too, lately, in my daytime strolls amidst

Nature’s canvas, i observe daffodils surrounded

in a knoll of verdant grasses, their stems are

intertwined t’if embracing and as i walk further

along, i notice, also, a sea of jonquils swaying,

dancing in the breeze  bracing each other

and so i ask of my life partner, that from now

on when our lips come together for that peck

of affection, can we, also, put our arms around

each other, chest to chest, for a moment feeling

our two hearts beating and the warmth of this

embrace further notices each other’s presence