Saturday, May 14, 2022

when i am gone

 

mine eyes rarely close in peaceful sleep, for i ponder

moment to moment~ as my years are fewer ahead

of me than those behind, i grapple with the notion

of not having my consciousness of being me~

 

i do not fear that i will die, but will be grieved of no

longer, smelling, touching, feeling, loving those of

whom i love and of the earthly things of which i care

 

wherefore, of my absence here, where will i be, and

will the memories that someone has of me or me of

them, will they be entailed of my consciousness, of me?

 

in that i sincerely believe that love is the essence of all

that exists, and having witnessed love, in its many forms,

will i remain in existence in love’s universal spiritual realm,

when i am gone?

Sunday, May 8, 2022

Happy Mother's Day/2022

today i celebrate one of the only designated days of the
Gregorian calendar that i appreciate its true worthiness,
‘Mother’s Day’
the human who is a conduit in this natural world of giving
birth, providing the cradle for life in lieu of the destructive
proclivities of ‘Man’
if given the choice, a ‘Mother’ allows her incarnate shell
to be the shelter for conceiving a life through an action
of selfless Love
this must be her choice and not made by those that wish to
‘rape’ them of this choice, yes, i stated ‘rape’ them of the
ownership of their body in lieu of self-serving agendas
on this day, let us celebrate the human whose role in this
world, not solely of course, but critical to the perpetuation
of life, thus Love, on Mother’s Day!

Wednesday, April 27, 2022

as life kisses me

 

sadness is a moment in time and

joy is also, they come when they do

and they disappear when they must,

yet they are present when they should

 

like the sun light grasping the waves as

the dolphin jumps o’re them and the moon

beams kiss the sea, while the osprey plays

on the face ot the moon in the noir of night

 

let all this be, as life kisses me…

 

absence grows fonder

 

when the sleeping sunflower arises in the wake of morn

to greet the rising sun and it looks to its side and notices

that its friend and partner, long by its side, does not

raise its head its petals to also greet the sun, it realizes

that its buddy has wilted into the state of lifelessness.

does it lament for the loss of its partner or does it think

that it is better for this because it does not have to share

the sun’s rays, the dew and drizzle of rain, the breeze, the

bees and the hummingbirds?

 

as the day goes on the sunflower witnesses that the sun’s

light is dimmed, the rain no longer titillates its cilia on its

stem, not so many bees and hummingbirds visit and the

breeze has become a bending wind. it then realizes that

all the pleasures of before are no longer present in the

absence of its partner that now lies down beside it, no

longer upright and sturdy, it now is ready to become feed

for tiny terrestrials and fodder for mother earth   

Monday, April 25, 2022

'seventy-first' day on this earth

 life is a treasure chest, within is a treasure-trove

called Love


some of us will find the chest, not by searching but

by opening one’s eyes and realizing the treasure

that is inside

i have been one of whom is very fortunate to

have found this treasure and have been witness

to Love

 

these past few years, we have all been witness to

suffering and pain, to loss of loved ones through the

vicissitudes of life

 

the pain does not subside, but we must bare witness

that if we loved and were loved but one moment in

time, this grace bestowed upon us is more than many



i am grateful for this, and if i can, would like to sprinkle

the spirit of my fortune to all who wish to embrace

and sparkle from this



mostly, i would like to kiss the heart of the love of my

life, my partner, my wife for she has loved me through

all the ups and downs, my family also, although distant

sometimes both in body and mind


Wednesday, March 30, 2022

sharing words with each other

 

my apprehension is not for or because of

the words i choose to place in writ before

you, but for the reaction or lack of action

and attention they will have for most who

read them

 

trying to paint artistic symbols upon the

canvas of script on scroll of that which

is in the fiber of my heart and the spirit

of my being, to impress upon yours the

feeling of kindness, the want for love

 

surely, life has garnered within you the

experience of pain and sorrow, the tears

that flow because of this but also the

moments of joys, the desire for the verve

of life

 

when first in the innocence of your born

vision of the morning sun, the sight and

sound of birds in flight and the songs they

sing, or capturing the running brook and

the feel of its cool stream upon your fingers

dipped



the love when first your mother held you

upon her breast and whispered…’i love

you my little one’ or when your eyes first

capture hers and maybe your daddy’s

as they smiled at each other then you



take pleasure in these words, my words,

for i share them with you so that we both

can recollect the memory of similar and

common human moments, knowing that

we’re in this collective experience called

life, and to care for each other…

 

 

 


Sunday, March 27, 2022

our human option

 

What we are witnessing is the primeval

regression of ‘man’ without the checks of

those who believed us to have progressed

into a more ethical and moral human race,

in that hate and evil usurps all the historic

progress that supposed mankind had been

traversing on the path toward correcting the

most unfortunate historical forays we had

committed, the destructive nature of our

being. Sure, we have continued to placate

our supposed conscientious attempt at

being more caring about our human race, our

planet and all the other co-existing beings

but our setbacks come because we have not

addressed the cause of all our continued

destruction, that being, our complacency, our

insensitivity in accepting that we are not

alone, that we are all in ‘this’ together, that

we must stop being so selfish. We must

acknowledge that the alternative to evilness

and hate is kindness and love. If we begin

to recognize this option then maybe, just

maybe we can return on the pathway of

calm and peace, of caring for all that exists,

for each other in this realm of the mundane, 

caring for our planet, Earth…

how curious is love

 

Love is a curious ‘thing’,

what i think i know about it is,

having experienced it in various forms;

i know i Love Mamasita, i know i love my wife,

i know i love my canine children, know i love children’s

smiles, their innocence.

 

i know i love all feathered friends, terrestrials, trees and

flowers, rivers and the seas, mountains, clouds and sky,

know i love peace and calm for mankind and the

the absence of war.

 

This tells me that ‘Love’ is omnipresent, that it is the fiber

of all, thus the intrinsic makeup of all that is ‘being’, in

this mundane existence, therefore, love is life and

here for us to embrace if we open our eyes,

 our hearts, our minds, our spirits

Tuesday, March 22, 2022

unnecessary loss of souls

 

the lovely sun was shining bright today and i

felt its joyful rays fill the day with the verve of life,

but as my spirit was dancing, without suspicion,

tears began to well in mine eyes and abruptly

started flowing down the cheeks of my face

 

i knew not, in that moment why, but in reflection

i had realized that, although my spirit was dancing

with the vibrations of the sun’s rays, my heart and

mind had been accumulating feelings and thoughts

of those who weren’t so blessed

 

an acute moment of sadness came o’er me and,

so then, my body gave way to the angst and pains

that others may have been feeling while my fortune

of dance and joy of my spirit came face to my heart

for the souls and spirits of those that cannot

 

the imaginings within became overwhelmed by

the sadness and pain of those not only in this far

away land but also for those here at home in the

U.S. who had lost loved ones from the insidious

Pandemic these last two years

 

how blessed i and my family is that my last name

is not Taylor, Floyd, Brown, Tamir, Arbery or Locke

and their families left behind wondering, ‘why,

just for being black in America’?

 

all these images and thoughts floundered about

in my mind along with the images of bombed cities

of Kyiv, Kharkiv, etc., in Ukraine, and the millions of

civilians displaced. the images of fathers, mothers,

brothers, sisters, little children’s tears, all their

faces of trauma and fear.

 

Why? For what?

we're all in this together

 

the flower waits not for season’s change, it just

breaks through the dirt, the soil of earth to give

praise to the sun, feel the wind on its petals and

bathes in the rain while dressing the canvas of

the day with vanity to an aesthetic terrain

 

the water of the river runs into the lake, waiting not

for the tide of the sea to rise and ebb as it has a

journey to take, for the freshwater fish depend on it

to be itself as they swim to greet their ocean friends,

share their stories t’if a refrain

 

the eagle, the hawk, the blue jay and cardinal wait not

for the wind to blow for they have wings to fly from

clif to clif, tree to tree as the wolf stares up at them

from whilst he sits and howls at them letting them

know he’s content roaming and being earth-bound

 

and like the flowers, the rivers and oceans, the wolf

and our feathered friends, we bi-pedal beings, should

be what we were meant to be, content in sharing with

each other the fruits of Nature, being moral and kind,

creative, conservative yet progressive, caring for

Mother Earth

 

the day from reveries to dreams

when the flower looks up at the sun and

says, please give me your energy, your

light and let me become who i should be

for i am the light of those who see my

beauty and smell the wonder of my waft

 

so too, when the seas look up at the moon

in excitement asking, please do not cease

of being the strength of my tides and how

they allow the verve of life into those aqua

beings who reside within my spirit

 

and when the wind awakens the trees to

dance and the birds to fly carrying their

chorus of song for the day’s beginnings,

whilst the deer prances amidst the forest

wildflowers, the jonquil, and the lily

 

then the azure sky is covered in a crimson

attire as the sun lies down for it is tired from

the day’s sojourn, giving way to the nocturn

noir of night and so too are mine eyes, as the

moon takes to the sky, letting me transcend

from reveries to dreams  

  

Saturday, February 26, 2022

Life is a choice of Love

 

My heart hurts, my tears flow, my spirit that wishes

to dance but cannot because it recognizes all the

souls that have lost their dancing spirit in the land

of Ukraine, in the presence of ugly ‘war’

 

For those of you who still embrace the likes of ‘trump’

when he’s praising the ‘Putins’ of the world, those

autocratic leaders who use a dictatorship strong arm to

control and subjugate people, I disavow your presence

 

I am painfully disheartened by those that believe that

human existence, all life in this world that we should

hold precious, choose to be destructive of its nature in

lieu of propagating its existence in perpetuity

Thursday, February 24, 2022

we are the ominous wind

 

the wind is blowing silent but gradually with gusts that

are a precursor to stronger portentous winds, those that

may disrupt the calm of flora and fauna not to mention

the comfort of the human spirit

 

it is not of Nature’s affects that i speak, but the ominous

conditions created that are coming at the hands of ‘man’,

where his choices have and continue to impact the natural

peaceful co-existence of what we call life

 

so as the winds come blowing in and we awaken to the

day and first we hear its howling, then see its potential

destructiveness approaching by the bending of trees

and the flight of the fauna, we, humans, should take

accountability for the sake of our children and theirs

Thursday, February 17, 2022

the wind whispers to me

 

today, i was sitting home alone and listened to

the wind blow, heard voices that i hadn’t heard

for so many years but they spoke to me t’if they

were from yesterday, making my heart flutter as

my spirit recognized their essence, for they were of

mi ‘Mama’, mi ‘hermano’, mi Tía, mi Tío’, mi perrito,

‘Jules’

 

they projected that they were all well and that soon

i would join them in a world of joy, a realm of wonder,

where music never ceases, and the heart is sated, the

soul is always dancing

 

and i know that the wind blows because the moon

glows as it also makes the waves of the sea rise and ebb

in the noir of night and so i walked outside to greet the stars

as they flicker hello, and i said to them that I’m looking

forward to this sojourn of what i had spoken to the wind

about, asking if i could bring my loved ones with me, and

the moon smiled and whispered back, and in its own way

said, ‘it is, what is intended’

 

startled by this i stepped back, just then the wind began

to blow again and i heard the voices once more, and this

time they asked me if i was ready to come aboard, but i

had to decline, for i had not fulfilled my legacy, i had not

not written my epitaph, i had not finished expressing my

words of which i wish to leave behind…

 

Wednesday, February 16, 2022

Jasmine

 

sitting here, observing my 19yr. old little black haired mini poodle,

as she sleeps most of the time now, which is probably what i will

be doing in my aged latter years.

 

i wonder what she dreams, whether it’s of running, scampering,

Jumping about in playful exuberance, like she used to when she

was filled with the verve of youth

 

hoping this is what she is doing as i watch her rising and ebbing tummy

and chest in breathing and i cherish these moments in the presence

of her still with us in this domain

 

she has filled our, my wife and me, lives with a love that so many

don’t have the privilege of experiencing, let alone the touch of

human love

 

these last, hopefully, months or weeks or days are so very precious

to us and when i carry her up the stairs because she can’t climb

them any longer, and outside, i watching her smell the earth as she

feebly walks about and though she’s without hearing and seeing

she still senses my presence, and she still kisses me with that small

tiny tongue letting me know she loves me

 

i know many have experienced this type of love, giving us the pleasure

of the present, contributing to the value of life in this, otherwise mundane

existence.

 

you rescued us

Gracias, Jasmine!

Friday, February 11, 2022

choosing to be me

 

when i say, i’m looking for or i’m searching, it is inside

of me where i hope i can find the answer to all of this

 

the day begins after the night leaves, i try to be more than

witness to the dreams and reveries, making life worthwhile

 

and as i stroll on the path that i will choose, i will sing and,

so too, will dance to the tune inside my heart, of my spirit

 

play on, i say to myself about how i wish my life to be,

how i wish to love, how i wish to live, let not the woes

identify me

in the passing of time

 

in the passing of time, the flower changes its hue

the clouds soar by and the wind whistles through

telling all where it’s been as it makes the tree sway

whilst in it, birds play, the squirrels scurry about

as the night gives way to the delight of the day

 

in the passing of time, rivers run east and west

north to south and the seas welcome them as the

catfish and salmon continue their journey as they

greet the dolphin and orca comparing the running

of the river’s water to riding the ocean waves

 

in the passing of time, the human hath traversed

the valleys and the forests sharing with each other

from where they came and where they’re going,

while in their journey they greet the deer and run

from the bear and as an act of survival they hunt the

buffalo to use their skin for coats to wear

 

in the passing of time, the young boy grows to be a

man, and the young girl becomes a woman as she

propagates and perpetuates life with children and

the wolf howls with joy and the Eagle soars in the

celebration of this gift the female is bestowed by

Mothers’ Nature

 

in the passing of time, as a portentous storm comes in

laying havoc upon ‘man’s’ construction, interrupting his

self-made destruction by descending into vitriol, from

anger into hate, embracing apathy then making wars thus

in the telling of this storm, t’is that ‘man’ is not in charge

as he believes to be but is the universe’s spirit, its balance,

for this is how it will be, this is how it is…     

Wednesday, February 2, 2022

my spirit still dances

 

i’m grateful that the sun rose for me this morning

but for a couple of my friends, this past year, it did  

not for they have journeyed from this world onto 

a transcendent realm

 

i ponder upon, what most of us wonder, after the

loss of ‘loved ones’ as to which of us are the more

fortunate and, will the memory of each other reside

within us in perpetuity?

 

although, when i see the tree before me and our

feathered friends perched upon its limbs laying

praise with their songs for the rising sun, and so  

i question no longer, just witness and appreciate

 

for those who have departed from this mundane

existence would not wish for me anything other than

living life while being fully present by allowing my

spirit to dance and sharing the love they left with me

 

so, if nothing more when i depart, i wish to leave

with some words that might touch your heart and

 maybe, just maybe your spirit will also enjoy the

joy of dance

 

 

Saturday, January 15, 2022

perched on a sapling

 

i know my years gone by are too many too soon

my feels are that i have but scratched the surface

of a life not always well lived, although i have

painted my own canvas

 

i feel like a young bird that is perched on a sapling

singing my little heart to make rise my first morning

sun and not realizing the sapling i am perched upon l

will grow to be a grand old oak

 

in the morning the breath i take, although mine eyes

have not closed, transitioned from daytime reveries

to nighttime dreams, may be the first of the rising sun

but may also be my last

 

these words that i write today may be those of someone

else reading them long after my incarnate shell has

released its spirit, its soul from the tethers of this world,

from this transitory mortal stay

 

and whoever you are that is reading these words, please

sing them and never cease singing, for this sapling you’re

perched on will grow grand but you and she will depart

too soon, leaving your songs on this short sojourn

not ready to hear this

 

the love of my life, my partner, my wife said to

me the other day, almost whimsically, ‘ya know,

‘papa’, i’m ok if i die sometime in the near future

from this Leukemia. i have accepted my end, i’m

not afraid to die’. i walked away and into another

room in our abode, closed the door and tears flowed

and flowed because i can’t believe that she doesn’t

realize i may not feel the same, that I’m not ok if

she departs from my side sooner rather than later

 

i’m almost ten years her elder and of course i have

had similar thoughts, no fear, about my passing but

that’s because i’m older than her and these thoughts

considered, of our departure from this existence, is

that i wish for us two growing ‘old’ together, holding

each other as we traverse onto our transcending

journey, so to hear her utter these words to me really

hurt my heart and my spirit is disheartened with

this on my mind

 

i cannot bear the thought of losing her presence,

looking at her in front of me, staring deeply and

lovingly into those beautiful powder blues, hearing

her voice, holding her, kissing her every morning,

every day and always in the evening before resting 

our eyes to sleep, telling her ‘i love you more than

any human on this earth’. i think she knows this

because it is what i say to her every day, three times

every day.

 

the thought of losing someone that your whole being

is intertwined, enmeshed with, is what makes life so

much more painful than just the burdens of all the

other mundane struggles of life.

 

‘do not disdain portrayals of love or feign affection,

receive with open arms and heart life’s every emanation,

for loves will falter and tend to fade away and the heart

will be scorned and cry from day to day, do not fold within

like the flower that sleeps at the end of its season but, like

a perennial, leave a little room to start again’.