feliz año nuevo

many a daylight reveries and night time dreams

have passed, ruminations and interpretations
of where reality resides. what for are my peripatetic
dispersings in my awakenings but only to depose them
onto sleepless nights of confusion

the god of gods, the maker of my being, provides me

with the will of choice or has he ?
is my trail paved with palatable terrace stones
so that my every step directs me toward a
predetermined path and all of my contorted and
juxtaposed moments are of a duped puppet on strings?

has the residence of my being in this universe of

dark and light, of cold and warm, of noise
and silence, my tears having been heartless
only to the dysfunction of metabolic incarnations
and my sensorial portrayals having been but
valences, less than benevolent and without cause?

 

do my queries even purport anything in the

discourse of existence where if there is
no god of gods, no divine intention or intervention
to give all this some value or worth that we dupes
believe to be the ‘good’?

to this, though, i shall not deviate from my direction,

to give with appreciation of myself even if impoverished
with misgivings to thoughts of godlessness, 
these curious interpreted thoughts of my doing.
for i having noticed smiles of comfort, a joy
and warmth of being, to this i shall go on until
the end. i wish to be integral and heartfelt of all this
for this is what my new year will bring